Tattooing has become such a sought after career that now more than ever people want to get into the business. Years ago, this was a mystery but with the invention of the internet, tips and advice in securing an apprenticeship are readily available, however the vast majority of people can't be bothered to Google even the basics prior to approaching a shop.
This phenomenon has created a distaste in the mouths of almost every artist and shop and has become a sore spot that no one wants to speak up about for fear of offending.
The reality is, if you can't be bothered to respect the industry you want to become a part of, you're in the wrong industry.
Tattooing and respect go hand and hand.
So here's our top nine tips to pissing off the artists' you're approaching and guaranteeing you'll never succeed in your endeavour:
9. Send an Email, Facebook Message or Comment on an Unrelated Status
Nothing says "I respect the industry and am taking this seriously" like a generic email.
BONUS POINTS: If you leave a 4 star review while simultaneously requesting an apprenticeship or ask US to call you to further discuss this offer.
Your offer is not an opportunity to a shop. Apprentices are years of work where the artist gets nothing back but the hope that the apprentice turns out to be worth their time, finishes the apprenticeship and sticks around longer than 5 minutes after they've started tattooing.
8. Apply at a Shop You've Never Been Into or to an Artist You've Never Met!
We wholeheartedly wait with bated breath for a stranger to appear before us that we can eagerly bestow years of knowledge and time onto.
Try investing in your artist and gaining a real relationship prior to even asking, getting tattooed by your artist several times over months or years builds a level or trust in your love, respect and dedication as well as you show you respect the artist as an artist.
7. Only Half Finish Your Art OR Bring in an Empty Portfolio
The best way to show you understand the attention to detail and precision it takes to tattoo is by taking zero time to throw together a portfolio.
Try taking a few hours to curate a meticulous and well thought out portfolio to present to the artists, preferably showcasing multiple styles of art. We want to see as much of your art as possible but it should be shown to us with pride and attention to detail.
As a manager, I will literally take a look at a resume and if it is not aesthetically pleasing, easy to read, well thought out and precise, I toss it in the garbage. Your portfolio is your resume; Take the time to make it stand out against literally hundreds of others.
6. A Good Portfolio Features Your Best Infections & Blowouts!
We look forward to you dropping off your portfolio of scratcher "tats" — your pride in safe and clean practices is worth writing home about, clearly Blood-borne Pathogens and Cross Contamination are your passion, just in the opposite way we are looking for.
BONUS POINTS: Showing off your Turkey Club sandwich behind your setup shows us you can multitask like a boss AND that you're a kitchen magician in more than one sense. Thanks but we're not hungry.
5A. Suck Your Artist's Dick, Literally
(assuming they have one, but hey, we needed a catchy title)
This works best if the artist is married or in a relationship. That ALWAYS ends well.
5B. Suck Their Dick, Figuratively
Try to avoid requiring skill by flattery.
4. Tell Your Artist You've ALWAYS Wanted To Tattoo, Since Watching the Latest Season of Ink Master.
Reality TV shows what the industry is like, EXACTLY. We are just dying to add people to our shop that want to be an artist based on the reality tv parties, glam and money.
The reality of a tattoo artist is literally hours of drawing, self loathing, drawing, tattooing, more drawing and more self loathing. Meaning, it doesn't take a 30 minute coffee break to draw a portrait, and it certainly takes more than one sitting for a full sleeve.
3. Squander the Opportunity IF You Do Get One!
Featuring the hits: Never answering a phone, FUCK CLEANING UP AFTER MYSELF IM A ROCKSTAR, Leaving Early & Showing Up Late, Passive Aggressive Muttering Under My Breath, half ass homework and the bonus track - Excuses.
Apprentice: the nice way of saying shop bitch.
You should be constantly doing everything for everyone, ask what is needed daily, go above and beyond in your tasks, put in 110% in everything you're doing and IF you don't want to do that, then don't bother applying.
We love hearing how hard it is, we have no idea because we were never in your shoes. We also don't do everything we do as a test, us being dicks and making you clean up after us isn't to make you prove your dedication or to teach you something important — we are obviously just useless and mean. Wax on, Wax off.
1. Tell Your Mentor Where You Want Your Art to Go
Since you obviously know much more than your mentor, telling them the direction you want to take your art is appreciated. When we give constructive criticism we look for a complete disregard of our advice — this shows a strong will and rebel attitude. Since it's art, there's no right answer so just continue doing you, You Go Girl.
The tattoo industry can be one of the most rewarding and lucrative careers, but getting your foot in the door at a good shop can seem impossible, you’ll face more doors slammed in your face and you'll hear “no” more than you'll receive the silence to speak. Many would be tattoo artists refuse to listen to these rejections and chose the path of much criticism - learning at home. There are many pros and cons to both “traditional” apprenticeships and teaching yourself - but in an industry based entirely on talent, dedication and art - there is no right versus wrong - regardless of what traditional artists want you to believe.
The path you choose is the one that best suits your life and your personality type, but if you do it right and safe, no one way versus the the other will make you a better artist (now, this applies for learning to pierce as well).
Traditional Apprenticeships are the societal norm and what tends to be perceived as better, the benefits are obvious, you learn faster and make less massive fuck ups. Having a professional hovering over everything you do, from how you scrub tubes (if you even use tubes anymore!) to how you draw a tall ship, to how to tune your machine, how you apply stencils, how you clean the floor with a toothbrush (you can tell I come from a very traditional shop) - gives you a learning curve that may suck for the first few months or years till you're allowed to actually get some real needle in flesh practice but when you do start, the trial and error that comes from teaching yourself - doesn't exist.
In a traditional apprenticeship, you work for normally a year to 3 years for very little to no pay, you exchange grunt work and slave labor for knowledge and instruction, you leave with self loathing and are often pushed to break by your mentor(s) in an attempt to make you prove you're worth it. If you have ever watched Karate Kid, 9 times out of 10 - you're doing something so irrelevant to tattooing that you truly wander if you're ever going to get to hold a machine.
With a traditional apprenticeship, being young is your biggest ally - once you have a family, rent or a mortgage and have to provide - the nature of a traditional apprenticeship becomes to time consuming, however you tend to become a stronger artist faster, you don’t need to be as self motivated and you don't need to be a very independent person who problem solves and goes out of their way to achieve their goals. You have someone beside you, showing you the ropes and allowing you the safety of being in an already safe, sterile and professional environment. When you work at a shop, they have already established suppliers and a reputation that allows perspective clients the comfort of just walking in and trusting their word that you are ready to tattoo them. A traditionally taught artist has a respect and love for their industry unmatched by anyone, because they had to earn their place, through tears, sweat and self doubt - in the shop, they tend to bleed tattooing as more than just tattooing- but as a lifestyle, as their identity.
The worst thing about learning the hard way, is that it’s bloody fucking hard. You run into brick wall after brick wall, it’s long, frustrating and plagued with scepticism and regardless of how safe, sterile and clean you are - the reputation of “kitchen magician” or “scratcher” will surround you for years, if you can escape at all. You need to be smart, extremely determined and hungry, you need to become a business owner and a highly successful one at that, as you need to convince people to trust you. You will jump through endless hoops to get supplies and make mistake after mistake just trying to find out how to pull a clean line. The positives now are that YouTube is plentiful and there are hundreds of books written to teach you the basics, there is even tattoo school out there that can at the very least - teach you how not to give someone HIV. Teaching yourself something will take you at least twice the time it takes a shop apprentice, just because they have guidance. If you walk into a shop as a home based artist and ask for advice, you'll be laughed out the door, and Lord help you if you want to get into a reputable shop once you are a decent artist, as the reputation will haunt you till you become so good that people have no choice but to look past their pre-conceived ideas.
You are able to support your family by keeping a “real” job while you're learning and you can set your own schedule, which allows far more freedom than a traditional route, but you're also fighting against other home artists with ever dropping prices - that come and go like high school girls going through friends, which makes it hard to charge enough to cover your hobby - which is exactly what it is while you're learning.
You'll find that you end up learning on yourself a lot, and end up having legs like my husband (seriously, go lurk Travis Cadeau and check out some of the masterpieces he’s got on those legs….) and you'll end up looking back at your old work with such despair and disbelief that someone actually let you butcher them with that monstrosity - but hey - you're an artist, and in the end, regardless on what medium you are working with - if you don't hate your art then you're a douchebag.
In the end there is no better or worse - there are only good shops and bad shops, good artists and bad artists, and if you're going to succeed - you have to start somewhere, so If you're the type of person who thrives on other people, prefer being taught, like feedback, are patient, a good listener, believe in respect and tradition and are highly ambitious to become the best - I’d recommend the traditional path, but if you refuse to take no for an answer, if you are willing to fight day after day to learn, have a hunger that can only be satisfied by finishing what you start, if you're the type that makes their own path - then go the path of the most resistance and go with the knowledge that you are your only master.